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She explained “upgrade jewelry” to me: A man proposes with a diamond ring and for the ten-year wedding anniversary, he pays a few grand to upgrade it to a bigger diamond.

(The usual Wednesday night text exchange with my beautiful husband of 12 years and the father of my three children.) Yes, this is how French lovers kick romance’s arse! American romance, I always think about a girlfriend who worked in diamonds in New York.

Apparently, it’s a very common thing in the United States.

For me and my French girlfriends, this is so unromantic. With the French Lover, conversation flows like champagne, he can dazzle you with his mind for hours; he knows about art, political scandals, the fall of the euro, architecture, design.

Last month, I received a message from a nice looking guy with a friendly smile: “Love the Mc Gonagall hat! Just in case you don’t know, studies have shown that people who like Harry Potter are less likely to be serial killers or assholes.

” In France, you don’t go on dates, kiss or sleep with someone, all while knowing he/she is doing the same thing with someone else the next day. He doesn’t compliment parts of you but the you that you don’t even know he can see.

He will compliment your intellect if you’re used to compliments about your ass and vice versa. It is taken seriously in matters of achievement — i.e., orgasm is an obligation — but there has to be fun and good feelings. Minds (and bodies) are open in matters of foreplay, locations, positions and number of persons involved.

” I sighed – I really hate having to prompt or coach a man. I immediately began to envision him speaking to me in person, his accent titillating me as he offered to whisk me away to his homeland to visit his villa (because in this fantasy, he was rich).

Well – at least I could ask if he was actually a Frenchman, “Where were you born? The conversation became easier after that – he volunteered what he did for a living and asked about my work. I got dressed and went outside to work on the garden. I responded, “It’s a bit too soon for that 🙂 – we haven’t even met each other yet.” For God’s sake, man – gather your courage and ask me out! (PS, for the record, I have no problem with a woman asking a man out.

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I didn’t respond right away – I had things to do and places to go – but when I got back from a road trip, I messaged him, congratulating him on his fine taste in millinery.

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